Blech.

Is it truly this easy to slip back into a rhythm, that was created so long ago? A pattern that has been strayed away from for a year? Well, from my experience this last week... nothing is impossible. I don't really want to talk about it though... because from what I know about myself, talking gets me nowhere. I can sit, talk and bullshit all day long, but when it comes to doing something, I have to just do it. So, new subject.

I need to find something I love...

Speaking of love... I'm turning into such a pessimist. What is love? Do I even know what love truly is? These questions have been running through my mind for the longest time and I have yet to answer them. Maybe I just think I know what love is. I've had this brick wall built up so high, when it comes to giving someone my all in a romantic way. I'm listening to him sing his songs of love and loss and I feel my heart sinking in my chest...

My wall is starting to snap, crack and tumble...

I'm scared now -- unfortunately, this feeling is all too familiar...