My, my, my. What a long time it's been and it seems nothing has changed much in relation to how I feel about my life. For the last three years it's been this ongoing struggle to love my life. What has happened to me? Where did all of the joy and love for living go? I look to the stars and sky for hope, but for what? Why have I continued to dwell on the negatives instead of create the positives?
I'm so lost. I don't even know who I've become. I've become comfortable with the idea of being alone and allowing myself to wander freely. To discover the world with myself. To rely on only me. This journal has truly brought me to my knees emotionally... only because I'm still only finding myself talking about things instead of taking action.
My blast from the past has definitely stuck around. It's so funny how things happen. Another question to ponder... why? Why for? What is the purpose of all of this? To drive me absolutely bonkers with wonder?
The soul searching I've longed for, for so long truly needs to be acted upon. I'm just going to go. I'm going to just disappear into the great beyond. Find myself. Screw making plans with other people. Screw having other people included in my life that don't deserve to be a part of it.
No more talking. Only action. Farewell old me.
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